by Ray Newman, radio and television commentator, attorney, educator, author

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

YOUNIQUE

For reasons I cannot figure out, we have turned life into a competition. We so frequently think about our lives and how successful we are at living it, not in terms of what we have accomplished, but in terms of what we have accomplished relative to what the other guy has accomplished.

The amount of money we make, though sufficient to provide a comfortable place to live, food, clothing and other amenities, seems barely adequate when compared to the greater sum the other guy makes. Our home is not as large, the vacation we took was not as grand, the party we threw was not as elaborate, and, yes, the person we married is not as beautiful, as the other guy's. Instead of pride and joy and happiness, the constant competition and comparisons with others often makes our lives seem humdrum, mediocre and unsuccessful. After all, there will be virtually always someone who runs faster than we do.

The bandied about idea that we all have equal opportunity to succeed in life...the idea underlying the alleged competition...is not true. We have different physical appearances, different mental capacities (affected by different genetic or environmental influences), different levels of psychological health, different values, different financial resources available to us, different levels of social skills...all of which, plus another thousand differences in the people we meet and the circumstances we encounter, directly and dramatically impact our potential for sucess. Is it possible for someone to succeed no matter what? Sure, that is the attraction of lotteries. But to believe we otherwise have equal opportunities is to deny reality.

As species evolved, they became more and more complex, and the individual members of the species more anf more diverse. This diversity, this variety, is at the heart of the beauty and and splendor of human life. Individual success ought be measured solely by what each of us makes of our individual selves.

You are unique.

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